Same-sex divorce: can a collaborative approach help?

As same-sex couples across the country rushed to courthouses to get officially married after the Supreme Court ruling in 2015, some of them are now discovering that untangling those marriages may be trickier than they thought. In a perfect world, marriage equality is matched by divorce equality. However, same-sex divorce is relatively new legal territory. Many couples are having a difficult time … [Read more...]

In Your Spouse’s Shoes: The Importance of Empathy in a Divorce

What is the single quality that has the power to re-define the outcome of a divorce? Perseverance, clarity on what is most important, and focus all come to mind. However, I would argue that empathy is the ultimate answer. That may look like an unlikely choice given the traditional idea of a divorce. After all, divorce conjures up images of courtroom battles and bitter arguments, not … [Read more...]

“Thou shalt not play tug of war” and other tips for getting the most out of your collaborative team

Some of the trickiest aspects of supporting couples through a collaborative divorce result from the nature of my involvement. As a neutral financial planner, my role is to support both Husband and Wife so that they can make the best decisions regarding their assets and debt. That may sound straight-forward, and it would be – if it were not for clandestine requests I get from time to time. “I … [Read more...]

Collaborative Law Without a Wedding

As anyone who has ever been through a break-up can attest, just because you never got that marriage certificate does not mean the separation will be simple or easy. What happens to the couch you bought together? How about that painting you brought back from vacation in Hawaii? And what in the world do you do with your beloved dog, Snuggles? The situation only gets more complicated if the couple … [Read more...]

Divorce and Blended Families

Here is a hypothetical question for you. Do you invite an ex-step-brother to your wedding? And what is the proper way to address an ex-step-grandmother? As bizarre as they may sound, these questions are very real for many people. Statistics are sobering: 6 in 10 second marriages (and 3 in 4 third marriages) do not last. That introduces unique and complex dynamics into the already emotional … [Read more...]